Masturbation Horror Stories

I share stories involving masturbation taking a turn for the gruesome worse. It’s a series documenting some ridiculous and, often times, insanely painful methods of Self Love. You will find stories of accidents that almost cost the masturbaters their lives. It’s seriously fucked up. Cradle your genitals & clench your butt holes because these stories will make you cringe.

[NOTE: Masturbation Horror Stories is a featured series that  shows some ridiculous & insane methods of Self Love. You will hear stories of accidents that almost cost the masturbaters their lives. It’s fucked up. Cradle your genitals & cover your butt holes because these stories will make you cringe.]

Alright once again, I have a story for you, my kiddies. This is a tale of a young naive girl who didn’t understand a simple lesson and ended up with an object stuck inside of her ham wallet. Here’s her story…

I had a sex with a glass Coca-Cola bottle. It became stuck and wouldn’t come off and I realized it was because of vacuum pressure in that bottle caused it to seal inside my pussy. I had the ambulance come to drill a little hole on the pop bottle for it to let some air release and it came off. Never would fuck the damn bottle again. I love any toys beside something like this!!

True story, I read it on the Internet and they never lie there. What did we learn? Girls, never assume that things can’t get stuck inside of your lunchmeat. Next time you’re petting your moose knuckle, remember simple things that you should have learned in that year you dropped out of high school, more and more pressure filling up the gap inside you is not a good thing. Be smart and save up for a  real fucking sex toy.

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Masturbation Horror Story: Fiery Passion

[NOTE: Masturbation Horror Stories is a featured series that  shows some ridiculous & insane methods of Self Love. You will hear stories of accidents that almost cost the masturbaters their lives. It’s fucked up. Cradle your genitals & cover your butt holes because these stories will make you cringe.] Having discovered the pleasures of minty … Well? Get on with it!

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Masturbation Horror Story: Emotional Dick Scars

[NOTE: Masturbation Horror Stories is a featured series that  shows some ridiculous & insane methods of Self Love. You will hear stories of accidents that almost cost the masturbaters their lives. It’s fucked up. Cradle your genitals & cover your butt holes because these stories will make you cringe.] Alright, so it’s time once again … Well? Get on with it!

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Masturbation Horror Story: Metallic Sex Toy

[NOTE: Masturbation Horror Stories is a featured series that  shows some ridiculous & insane methods of Self Love. You will hear stories of accidents that almost cost the masturbaters their lives. It’s fucked up. Cradle your genitals & cover your butt holes because these stories will make you cringe.] Humans are so very crafty. We … Well? Get on with it!

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Masturbation Horror Story: Pencil Pocket

[NOTE: Masturbation Horror Stories is a featured series that shows some ridiculous & insane methods of Self Love. You will hear stories of accidents that almost cost the masturbaters their lives. It’s fucked up. Cradle your genitals & cover your butt holes because these stories will make you cringe.] Believe it or not, men aren’t … Well? Get on with it!

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Masturbation Horror Story: A Man and his Vacuum

[NOTE: Masturbation Horror Stories is a featured series that shows some ridiculous & insane methods of Self Love. You will hear stories of accidents that almost cost the masturbaters their lives. It’s fucked up. Cradle your genitals & cover your butt holes because these stories will make you cringe.] Aaaaaaaaaaaaaalright well, I know it’s been … Well? Get on with it!

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Masturbation Horror Story: Me So Honi

[NOTE: Masturbation Horror Stories is a featured series that shows some ridiculous & insane methods of Self Love. You will hear stories of accidents that almost cost the masturbaters their lives. It’s fucked up. Cradle your genitals & cover your butt holes because these stories will make you cringe.] Last night in Hong Kong, the … Well? Get on with it!

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